I've not had a whole lot of luck in the past with using vibrators in the bedroom. They have a habit of being overpoweringly nerve-killing numbing, or buzz boringly. Indeed, I've even had the misfortune of breaking some expensive toys by means I still can't figure out. Nothing like plastic cracking against one's most sensitive areas and all but slicing the skin, right?
Still there? I know, I cringed too, and I'm the one writing this.
Suffice to say I've had horror with the things. I vowed them off, declaring they would never again find their way into my hands. But the fact is, time changes and with it products become more innovated and inventive, and I was both shocked and delighted to happen across this little guy:
It's a bug. A buzzing butterfly bug, made of jelly and complete with straps.
Oh God. Straps. The bondage-loving bastard that I am cannot resist, and so my eyes tore themselves from the delightful looking contraption to drag fearfully over to the price.
What. What's this?
I was stricken, staring stupidly at the screen with coffee in hand and nearly spilled. Surely this must be a cruddy piece then! Certainly, whyever else would it be so cheap? Ahah! Like the sleuth that I was, I dashed (or rather clicked) my way to the reviews, fully intent on finding chagrined owners with dismay written all over the page.
But no, I instead find pleasant reviews, with happily satisfied customers.
And so I bowed my head, admitted defeat, and purchased the Vibro Wings. I now await its arrival with trembling anticipation, and fully plan to test it out in thorough on my beloved. Expect critique! Expect raging reviews (and potentially raging other things depending on how well this works)! It should arrive discretely at my door this wednesday.